Okay, so I NEVER write about beauty tips, makeup or clothes. I’ve never really been into that kind of thing, mostly because I’m lazy and also because I’m usually the LAST person on my mind. I have four kids, a dog, two cats, a budding writing career, a blog and a ton of housework. Lately, I’ve been complaining a lot because I’m over my head with all my responsibilities. I barely have the energy to make myself get up in the morning and do my daily chores, much less worry about my clothes or my hair.
I have been super down on myself lately.
I guess every woman feels this way from time to time, especially as we grow older.
I snapped a picture a couple of weeks ago of my mother and myself as we were dining at a restaurant and I was both shocked and pleased with my gray hair in the picture. In fact, I was proud! I haven’t colored my hair in about four years, and I was letting myself go gray naturally (and if you’ve never tried to do it….it is HARD.) feeling proud of every single gray hair. I am prematurely gray, as I’m only 38 – turning 39 next month and a combination of genetics, stress and lack of good sleep has contributed to my ever-increasing head of silver strands. I was beginning to own the gray, feeling confident in my “wisdom highlights” and just beginning to feel comfortable in my own skin.
My toddler hugged me one day and said, “Old mommy. Mommy like MeeMee.”
Record scratch. Like, seriously….the entire world stopped.
MeeMee is what my children call my mother….their grandmother. So, essentially my sweet little toddler was telling me that I look like his grandmother. Not that my mom isn’t super fabulous, but she is the grandmother…..I AM the mom.
My mom didn’t like the picture we took at the restaurant at ALL. She asked me, “When did we get so OLD?” A couple of days later, my mom dyed her short hair platinum white….and let me tell you, it looks AWESOME! She looks like a modern, edgy grandma….very hip and sort of Jaime Lee Curtis meets Debbie Harry. I LOVED it!
So, I asked her if she would do my hair too. Mom was a beautician in the 1960s, and knows about hair color, cuts and all that. She was Vidal Sassoon when that whole thing was going on.
She said she would give my hair a makeover. I squealed with delight, even though I was afraid of the outcome. It took almost 3 hours to pull my hair through a cap…..I was going for highlights….nothing too drastic. Just a little change.
Well…..after we pulled my hair through the cap (which HURT like a MOFO because I have long hair) we bleached the hell out of it…..with 40 Volume developer. I was expecting my hair to just turn orange, like it always has when I’ve tried to go with blonde highlights…..but it didn’t. My hair turned WHITE with some inside the banana peel yellow. AWESOME! And thank you to the hair gods, for my hair not falling out in big chunks from using such a strong developer.
Anyway, mom told me we needed to “tone” my hair so that it wouldn’t be so stark against my dark brown, and I said “okay” I didn’t want to look like a skunk – but I put toner ALL over my head, and not just the highlights…..and we used 30 Volume developer mixed with Wella T14 toner (thank you Sally Beauty Supply.)
When I rinsed and washed, and looked in the mirror……I gasped!
My. Hair. Was. Blonde! Almost platinum blonde….
I didn’t even recognize myself!
Long story short…..I now have blonde hair. It isn’t bad, but I still look a little strange. I mean, I’ve been a brunette ALL my life (except when I was a redhead for a hot minute….oh, and when I dyed my hair jet-black one time) and this transformation has been a little overwhelming.
Now that my hair is blonde, I deep conditioned the heck out of it and then played around with the style a bit. After about a thousand selfies, I decided to try and tone it again because I’m not a big fan of the Gwen Stefani fake platinum look. I mean, some folks can carry it off but it’s just too high maintenance for me personally and I don’t have the skin tone for it. Then, I decided my eyebrows were too dark and I plucked the heck out of them….thank God for eyebrow pencils, and eyebrow mascara, right? Then, I played around with my makeup…..
I felt like such a high-maintenance douchebag. Here I am primping and preening in front of a mirror all day like a Paris Hilton wannabe. That’s not who I am.
Anyway, after I quit beating myself up…..I came down off of the chemical bleach high and decided to just like myself. Whatever, you know? I feel younger….I look younger and my husband loves it (I was worried that he would hate it.)
Three out of four of my kids are blonde, and my husband is blonde (when he has hair) so I just figured I would sort of just blend in with the rest of my blonde family.
Anyway….that’s my story for this week. I’m a blonde now. And the odd thing is, I don’t hate it. In fact, people treat you differently when you’re blonde…..people are nice – why don’t brunettes get that kind of love from strangers? Something to ponder……
Here is the before and after:
I still need to work on my skin and makeup, and update my hairstyle… but I’m still playing around with it.
My final thoughts on the makeover thing? I don’t know. I still have to wait a few more days to see if I’m gonna keep my hair this color….or a few months since I’ll completely kill it if I do anything else to it. I think a makeover every now and then is just a female thing to do…..if you’re tired or bored with your look…..just change it! But, looks aren’t everything. It’s a hard to understand if you look around at our selfie-obsessed world. I guess my final thought is this: I don’t look like a grandmother anymore. I don’t feel like a grandmother anymore. And I guess that’s what I was going for:) I’m a little more high-maintenance now, but I guess that’s a good thing, since I was really letting myself go. I’m turning my husband’s head now…..and I’m taking better care of myself. No more pizza and pasta….I’m drinking water and exercising…. I’ve even decided to let myself have a beach vacation for my 39th birthday…..so out of this whole deal, a lesson has been learned. I won’t neglect myself any more, and I will not allow myself to feel guilty for taking a break, or doing something for “me” every now and then. If mommy is happier, then everyone is happier.
As long as it doesn’t become an entirely self-focused thing, (and I would never do that) then I think it’s all good.
Change can be a good thing:)
Life is short…..why not?
Maybe I’ll dye it pink……